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Coaches' Corner: Navigating the Crucial Point of Career Change

Posted February 25th, 2010 by Barbara Alexander

This symbol, weiji, has had a place of honor in my office for many years. You know the one - the Chinese word for crisis, composed of two characters: the first represents danger and the second opportunity. JFK entered this symbol into the American lexicon through a speech he gave at the convocation of the United Negro College Fund. Trouble is, linguists think that he got the translation wrong. Danger is certainly appropriate for the first symbol; the mistake comes on the second symbol which is something more like a crucial point. While JFK’s words remain firmly embedded in our collective mind and does provide a useful perspective, the correct translation more accurately describes what a crisis is really like . . . a crucial point that feels dangerous.  Few of us doubt that the world is in crisis on many levels. We are at a crucial point in human history, and indeed these are dangerous times. But it is equally true that development occurs when we reach a “tipping point,” that is, a point when old structures and systems no longer serve us and enough of us can envision a new future. Integralists believe we are approaching such a moment. This is the hope that animates us and it is the reason I get up in the morning.

 
It may feel like global crisis is a tad removed from our lives, like our individual lives are tangential to it. We may feel we have only a tenuous connection to the larger events of human history, but such is not the case. For the fear that rises within this dangerous and crucial moment affects us all. All of us feel the impact of deteriorating economic, social, and political systems. All of us understand the uncertainty that is part and parcel of a world in flux – ready to evolve.
 
As a coach, I see the crisis impacting people most personally in their careers. The shifting structures and systems have already resulted in massive unemployment. Many still employed are questioning what they are doing with their lives. Our crucial points are a microcosm of the macrocosm. How shall we approach such a moment?
 
It seems all too natural to withdraw in fear, to shrink away from a different kind of future – all too natural to seek the nearest security we can grasp. We’re hard wired to survive, so we shift into our automatic patterns, focused on keeping ourselves safe. But such fear does not serve the hope that animates us. This crisis, our crises are calling us to examine what we do for a living from a new perspective – one that serves the planet, serves the human adventure, serves the good, the true and the beautiful. 
 
As I work with people in these dangerous, crucial points of life some are feeling dissatisfied with no sense of what’s next. Still others feel a tug toward the “next” with no idea how to get there. All of us know the fear that can shut us down. But when we listen to the deepest voice within our heart, we know that there is another way, a generative way, an imaginative way.
 
The crisis that undid me, the one that nagged at me and dragged me toward my “next,” caught me completely unprepared. It came by way of the “still, small voice.” One morning in meditation it offered a clear directive. I remember feeling scared, terrified actually, and then promptly forgot it! In the intervening months before it happened again, (of course it happened again), I began to experience a decided lack of energy and enthusiasm in my work. When I wasn’t ignoring these obvious signs, I criticized my lack of engagement with the career I’d loved for so long. This was my particular recipe for contracting and protecting myself in the midst of a dawning crisis.  
 
When the “still, small voice” returned it was persistent. Finally I began to listen. I learned, as Pema Chodron reminds us in The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times, “never to underestimate the power of compassionately recognizing what’s going on.” 
 
Two years (and several layers of my false self) later, I left my life and went back to school. It was an excruciatingly difficult process but it was not nearly as difficult as living a contracted, energetically stultified life.
 
“Compassionate recognition,” is part of the journey we take in those dangerous crucial times – those times that reflect the crisis that surrounds us. As I walked that road I learned to ask myself some compassionate questions. I offer them in hopes that they may be helpful as you encounter your own crucial point. For dangerous as the moment may be, there is hope. Something new is emerging and we’re all a part of it. 
  • How do I keep myself from experiencing the present with all it has to offer me? 
  • How do I accept the feelings that surface when I stop contracting against them? 
  • Are my beliefs and assumptions true or are they destructive habits of mind? 
I offer one last note. I didn’t do this alone. While change is ultimately ours to do, someone outside yourself can see the ways you approach an issue, much more clearly than you can - especially during a crisis. Integral Coaching is designed to do just that. It helps you see all of yourself, your whole AQAL constellation as well as the path that will help you expand and meet your current difficulty. We know we’re all in this together so do yourself a favor, don’t go it alone. 
 

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No private messages?

Posted March 1st, 2010 by Durwin Foster

Hi Barbara:

After reading your articulate post, and your bio, and I was going to send you a private message, but you have disabled them for some reason.  Do you mind me asking what is your reason?

Yours,

Durwin

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Durwin Foster

durwinfoster@gmail.com