Big Mind in the Treetops

I've spent the last couple of days hanging in trees, learning to facilitate high ropes courses from a technical standpoint, which is not a normal milieu for me. First task of the day was to climb about 80 feet - 90 feet up a sap-leaking tree to thread a pulley fo a ropes course. I ended up just covered in sticky tree sap, which accumulated layers of grime over the course of the day. (Between the knots I learned to tie, being harnessed onto ropes, the bruises, and the gasoline I needed to pour into my hair to get the sap out, it sounded far kinkier than it actually was.) The past couple of days have been a great way to also learn the textures of fear - which is one of the reasons I decided to do it.

I had an entertaining Big Mind moment. It was at the end of the day and I was just exhausted. I'm balancing on a log, which isn't hard - except that I'm a few feet out on it and it is suspended fifty feet (about five stories) above the forest floor. I called back, "I'm just plain tired!" It takes a lot of mental and physical stamina and focus to cross...I'm also afraid of heights, so there's energy spent managing that and feeling the flavors of my own fear. Dean, my colleague and the ropes expert training me, called back, "What do you need to call up in yourself to get across?"

For whatever odd reason, I decided NOW was the time to practice Big Mind. I'm literally hanging in the air, and I went straight for Mahavairocana Buddha. I'm not sure what that instant choice was about - perhaps because it's the most integrally connected place in voice Genpo Roshi evoked in me and maybe Self thought I needed that. It definitely got me grounded and centered fast, but the shift in perspective to non-egoic and non-dualistic had me in a fascinating (from a Self perspective) way - the sunlight took on an incredible quality, this sense of life dancing...there aren't really words for it. I didn't get "fully" into that voice, as my visceral experience from being with Genpo Roshi was much more all consuming - but really, it wasn't the right time, and my Protector said so!

Protector abruptly reared up and said: Hey, umm...this is cool and all, but NOT the best voice from a sheer survival standing on a log suspended in midair!
Self said: Let's try speaking to the Body.
Body said (and WAS in an emboided way): Trust me. (There was this sense of lowering my center of gravity, and trust. If I put it into words, it was a knowledge of my own body having a deep sense of how it worked and all I had to do was trust it to move across. This is the aspect of self that knows I've been a dancer and knows how  my muscles move, even though I can and will frequently trip walking down a perfectly even sidewalk. When Body arose, I actually walked a few more feet out.)
Voice of Curious, Experimental Self decided to chime in and said: Huh...this is fascinating. I wonder what voice of the Mind has to say. We could try Apex...
Voice of the Mind had no trouble screaming, on the slightest invitation: This is F*CKING NUTS! Voice of the Body is absolutely batshit. Just trust me? Seriously?! Do you have ANY idea how far down the ground is?! (Externally, I almost immediately grabbed the safety rope and hung on when I turned the volume up on Mind.)
Protector said: Go back to the Voice of the Body! And btw, later when you're not hanging in the air, Body and Mind might have some relationship issues to work out.
Body - Body didn't say anything - Body just breathed and kept moving across the rest of the beam til I got safely to the platform on the other side.

This all happened in about 30 seconds while I was in midair.  With hindsight, it was likely Fearful Irrational Mind than Mind itself that popped up.  I was partly fascinated in retrospect because the voices really were so incredibly distinct and clear! And in the depths of my mind, She Who Finds Everything Funny was definitely laughing.