more sex scandals?

Very sad.  Are there any women out there who still hold marriage sacred...and refuse to sleep with a married man?  I don't think they were married but they have a bond, and that bond is just as sacred.  Marc's character has been exposed and the women who animate him.

Hi, Jane.
I'm glad this was blogged about and posted here. It seems that the blogger is William Harryman, eh. I'm not sure that people who took Marc at his word and in good will supported him some more should be overly sullied. In a way, it is a gracious act to try to perhaps, like, forgive. And in the end, it was maybe wasted a bit, an error made. Yet not without some respect.I had a surfacey micro-crisis of sorts recently where I couldn't value so much some integral stuff. I dropped out of the ISE enrollment as my reactions and self-doubt, and other-doubt, roiled through me. Marc Gafni has stood in the forefront of my imagery of ISE and I have felt some distaste for his manner of self-presentation, not totally separate from his content. When I withdrew my enrollment, I actually felt some relief that I was withdrawing from his influence and stature which tainted the affair.Normally I don't enter these discussions but I felt like clearing myself this way and maybe joining some of the we-space of moral or aesthetic indignation. I don't believe much of what he says when he speaks, so why would I want to listen.Blah, blah. Bowing.ambo

 

If the information in the mentioned blog is correct it would be very hard to be in denial that there is a problem here. But it seems to me that the problem is much bigger than just Mr. Marc. He is far from the only integral leader or integral student to behave in a very unethical manner. Is anyone else beginning to see a pattern here?

Where did we ever get the idea that we are above ethics, have no responsibility to treat others with dignity and respect, or that it is OK to act like selfish arrogant assholes and that goodness and beauty would come of this?

Where is this problem coming from?

In my opinion, the way it is currently practiced, Integral Life Practice is defective. In the book Integral Life Practice they give some lip service that; “without an authentic intention to behave ethically, Integral Life Practice cannot really begin” (p. 258). And yet down on the ground I see most integral leaders and students placing very little emphasis on the sincere practice of ethics.

In my opinion, until we make ethics a core module and become a community dedicated to behaving ethically and bringing more goodness and beauty into the world it is likely that more harm will come of the integral movement than good.

I know Ken Wilber’s heart is behind ethics, goodness, and beauty. I just don’t know why he does not courageously stand up for it more. It is sad that the few of us who keep raising the issue are often attacked by  people trying to censor us and that there seems to be so little community support of ethics, goodness, and beauty. Let’s pray that we can outgrow this soon.

 

here is Mariana Caplan writing in Sept 2010: 

"The essence of love is perception," according to the teachings of Marc Gafni, "Therefore the essence of self love is self perception. You can only fall in love with someone you can see clearly--including yourself. To love is to have eyes to see. It is only when you see yourself clearly that you can begin to love yourself."

It is in the spirit of Marc's teaching that I believe that a critical part of learning discernment on the spiritual path is discovering the pervasive illnesses of ego and self-deception that are in all of us. That is when we need a sense of humor and the support of real spiritual friends. As we face our obstacles to spiritual growth, there are times when it is easy to fall into a sense of despair and self-diminishment and lose our confidence on the path. We must keep the faith, in ourselves and in others, in order to really make a difference in this world.

Adapted from Eyes Wide Open: Cultivating Discernment on the Spiritual Path (Sounds True)--

What I think is missing here are some loving and loyal red-meme brothers willing to break a few knees for their loyal, loving and love-deluded-jilted sisters!  And women need to mine our developmental history to find the red-meme sister within too. It is time to love and embrace that quality in each one of us that draws a line in the sand and takes a stand.  Where is Pipi Longstockings? We are able up-leveled our collective love/sexual developmental lines  from beige and purple to the line that represents a willingness to find out what what is really going.   Our banner could blaze:  "be honest or be gone". 

(My heart goes out to Mariana and everyone else here.... this friggin' lesson sucks..... no matter who is at the brunt of it....) 

 The fabric of my life is the cloth with which it is my task to polish the lens of my own perception.

                Once a brother committed a sin in Scetis, and the elders assembled and sent for Abba Moses. He, however, did not want to go. Then the priest sent a message to him, saying: Come, everybody is waiting for you. So he finally got up to go. And he took a worn-out basket with holes, filled it with sand, and carried it along.

--

This is not a unique situation--human beings have a well-known set of dilemmas that seem to play out at every stage of development with predictable results. The more interesting headline would be "Spiritual teacher walks his talk at all times despite being deluged with constant temptations, then retires young in order to preserve his sanity."

Charismatic alpha males are primed by high levels of testosterone and dopamine and it's not unusual for them to act out. Gore Vidal once said that turning 70 was a relief because he was finally released from the tyranny of the male libido. Kurt Vonnegut said that becoming impotent was like being allowed to finally dismount from a wild horse.

I found it interesting that the head shots of Marc and Marianna show both their heads cocked at a fairly severe angle.