The Way of the Great Dragon: Part 4 by Marc Gafni

Continued from last week...

Abraham Kuk writing in Jerusalem between the World Wars taught that the purpose of living is to learn what he calls “the great art of loving.” Ultimately what the mystics are teaching is that the path of the dragon can only be walked in love. Indeed the two approaches encouraging embracing the shadow, the path of the dragon and the path of love, are really one path. It is rather a question of the spiritual methods used to embrace and elevate the shadow.

One deals with the shadow by subduing the evil, the other, by transforming it. If one subdues the shadow by concentrating on good and ignoring evil impulses, there is still the danger that the shadow may lurk and subvert the G-dly service. The shadow has not been integrated and ultimately one’s spiritual self will lack integrity.

“Teshuva” is literally translated as return or repentance. There are two forms of repentance, Lower and Higher Teshuva. The former entails the quashing of all of his primal passions and drives and accepting the yoke of heaven upon oneself. The higher form of repentance requires that the shadow energy be fully accessed to reclaim all that was distorted, repressed, and even abused along the way. As we now know, primal drives, which emerge from the depths of self, are the source of shadow energy.

In other words, lower teshuvah is a return to the rules; Higher Return is a return to the soul’s essence. In the language of philosopher mystic, the master Abraham Kuk:



When we forget the nature of our essential soul

When we forget the importance

Of reaching into our inner lives

All becomes confused and uncertain.



The primary transformation

Which reveals the light in

the darkness

Is that a person return to

the root of his soul.



And that . . .

Is to return to G-d

Who is the soul of all souls



The Talmud cites an argument about the power of teshuva: “Great is the power of teshuva for through it our intentional zedonot (pathologies, sin, and intentional shadow violations) are considered by G-d to be unintentional. A second opinion disagrees, arguing, great is the power of teshuva, for through it our intentional mistakes become the source of our greatest merit.”

An interesting argument: Are intentional violations counted as unintentional violations or are they actually transformed into merits? The sages solve this conundrum by explaining that the former is true if one repents out of fear and the latter is true if one repents out of love. If you are motivated by fear—such as fear of punishment or getting caught—then you will be moved to lower teshuva. That is, a return to the rules. The most you can hope for in this scenario is to have your zedonot forgiven by an act of grace and counted unintentional.

If however you are motivated by the passionate love of G–d—by a desire to come close to Him and serve Him—then you have the opportunity to walk the path of higher teshuva. In this way the mistake is not only forgiven but is transformed into merits, into Good. To return to the parable of the shattered vessels, the shells surrounding the spark of good in the evil are peeled away and the G-dly sparks travels upward to the higher worlds and are reunited from where they originated—in the worlds of united G-dliness. The primal energy hidden in the shadows is now released and used for personal power and transformation.

This transformation happens in two ways. One is the rubber-band effect:

Here distance provides the power for change. The farther away one is from the soul’s essence, the greater the longing and yearning to return. Just as when a rubber band is drawn farther and farther back and is finally released, it shoots forward with incredible force—so too when one’s G-dliness is released from the shadow into the light it is enormously powerful, reclaiming the soul’s essence.

There is however a second way to understand Higher Teshuva, which lies at the core of this teaching. In the path of higher teshuva one accesses the core shadow energy. This energy—rooted, as it is in one’s most primal and essential self—is far more potent than the more staid and bland energy emanating from the more refined parts of the self.

Following the example of the Alter Rebbe, allow me to suggest a simple yet profound illustration. Let’s say I have something nice I want to say about a friend. I call a mutual acquaintance to tell them. Their line is busy. “Oh well,” I say to myself, “I’ll tell them tomorrow.” Now imagine one has an incredibly scandalous piece of gossip about an acquaintance of whom they are not particularly fond. One calls a mutual friend to share the gossip. The line is busy. A person may call back ten times until they get through.

A second example, a friend needs help. They need you to show up at a meeting or to make a call to help set something right. You may do it. Often, however, it’s so easy for so many things to get in the way. “I’ll make the call,” we say, “but it may take a few days. I’m really busy.” Now imagine that you need to call a friend to fire the clergyman you intensely dislike. You will make that call immediately and, although you may hide it, there may be a small amount of satisfaction and even relish in the act.

The difference is simple. The second instance in both examples involves accessing shadow energy. Points out 19th century myth reader, Reb Tzadok HaCohen, shadow energy is rooted in the most pristine light sources of the spirit and is thus always more powerful than the more benign desire for the good.

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Marc Gafni

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