Home for the Holidays Teleseminar Show #4

 Show 4:  Trying a New Way #2

Review the list of muscles you targeted as being critical to your development in your “home for the holidays” topic. Choose another one to strengthen over the next two weeks. 

Once again, this exercise asks you to do something new 2-3 times daily. Remember to keep this novel action simple and concrete. Keeping it simple allows you to feel challenged but not overwhelmed, so you’ll be more likely to follow through with this exercise. Choosing a novel behavior that is specific and concrete will enable you to identify the impacts of regularly engaging in this new action.

Examples:

To take the perspective of another person: As you listen to someone express an opinion, imagine what it must be like to be this person. Really try to feel into this human being in front of you. Can you tap into feeling compassion for him or her?

To be more comfortable in staying with intense emotions in another: Begin to notice when you feel uncomfortable in the presence of someone who is expressing strong emotions. What do you feel pulled to do? See if you can simply return to noticing your own breath and allow yourself to act as a witness to this person’s emotions without getting attached to an outcome.

To be able to see one’s own part in the pattern: Catch yourself playing out a familiar pattern, and ask, “What is my internal dialog and my emotional and somatic response? How does these answers contribute to the pattern in which I find myself?

To be able to stay in one’s own body when triggered: When you are triggered, begin to notice your breath as it flows into and out of your body. Then notice your arms and legs.  Feel your awareness ground itself firmly back in your body.

To feel emotions without being overcome by them: Try naming your emotion(s) as they arise, and note any somatic responses you perceive, as well. Bring a gentle, compassionate curiosity to this observation, and simply stay with describing your experience.

At the end of each day, write a bit about your experience of practicing something new and the situation in which you practiced it. What did you notice when you practiced your new action?

Before the next show, take some time to answer the following:

What possibilities become available to me when I follow through with my new action?

If I continue to practice these new actions, what effects might they have on how I interact with my family this holiday season?

Bonus Practice:

What is one thing that you could do this week that would allow you to feel grounded before and during the holidays?  You might consider going for regular walks, doing vigorous cardiovascular workouts, meditating, or knitting. Take some time each day this week to do this one activity in support of your staying grounded over the holidays. 

Please take a moment to acknowledge the care, energy, and risk you invested by delving into this practice. Tune in two weeks from now to hear how Huy faired during his trip home. We will be announcing our contest winner, as well. Be sure to come back here for your Integration Practice at the end of the show!

Not a contest finalist? You can still work with an Integral Coach on developing more meaningful relationships with your family or on helping you transcend any other area in which you feel stuck.  Visit here to start now!