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The Art of Integral Relationships
In this dialogue, Martin Ucik talks to Ken Wilber about his new book Integral Relationships: A Manual for Men, exploring ways to create a new level of love and intimacy that few of us ever thought possible.... |
Imagine a bookstore that organized its relationship books by the number of perspectives that their readers can take. Looking at the bottom shelf, you find books for preconventional, egocentric men (The Pickup Artist or The Professional Bachelor Dating Guide: How to Exploit Her Inner Psycho) and needy women (How To Catch a Millionaire, The Rules, or Men are Scum, Women are Stupid) who only have their own 1st-person relationship interests (sex/money/approval) in mind. On the next shelf are more conventional books, offering advice for men and women who want to make their partnerships work through understanding and accepting their gender differences by taking a 2nd-person "me-you" perspective. Titles might include Men are From Mars, Women are from Venus, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, For Men Only: A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women, or The Art of Loving. The third shelf features books that make use of a 3rd-person rational "it" perspective on love relationships, such as: Why We Love, Falling In Love, Getting The Love You Want, The New Rules Of Marriage, Passionate Marriage or The New Psychology of Love. Finally, the top shelf holds a row of books for lovers who can see their relationship from a 4th-person, postmodern, pluralistic, or spiritual perspective, including such works as: Love and Awakening: Discovering the Sacred Path of Intimate Relationship, The Path to Love: Spiritual Strategies for Healing, Undefended Love, or If the Buddha Dated. Partners who resonate with books from different shelves would have a difficult time resolving their relationship conflicts; or not get into romantic relationships with each other in the first place. Individuals at Integral or higher levels of consciousness would find partial truths in books from every shelf, but would not necessarily know how to put them into a larger context. This is what Integral Relationships: A Manual for Men has elegantly accomplished. It integrates the wisdom from over 200 relationship books, carefully chosen from every shelf, to allow men to meet women at their level of consciousness and co-create healthy loving relationships with them. Listen as Martin and Ken take a closer look at the new book, exploring ways to create a new level of intimacy and love that few of us have ever imagined possible.
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