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Perspective Shift:
- Ego dissolution is both blissful liberation and profound disorientation. Deep spiritual awakening isn’t only a serene experience of freedom — it also involves facing overwhelming confusion, chaos, and vulnerability as familiar identities and self-structures dissolve, forcing us into a new way of being human.
- True spiritual practice integrates ultimate reality with everyday life. Real awakening doesn’t deny or escape the human world. Instead, it demands we consciously choose to embrace and navigate both absolute emptiness and relative reality, living fully within the paradox of their coexistence.
- Spiritual bypassing is a natural—but limiting—part of spiritual growth. Using states of emptiness or spiritual concepts to avoid life’s complexities is common but incomplete. Authentic awakening calls us to recognize and move beyond these subtle forms of avoidance, engaging fully with the human experience.
- Emptiness is always accessible, regardless of developmental stage. Profound spiritual realizations aren’t reserved for advanced stages of consciousness alone. Experiences of ultimate reality can occur at any developmental level, each bringing unique insights and risks of misinterpretation or bypassing.
- Awakening needs community and structures of support. Profound spiritual transformations can be destabilizing in everyday life. Communities and relational structures are essential to hold and support individuals through these intense processes, similar to how monasteries traditionally provide safety during spiritual crises.
In this deeply illuminating episode of Evolving Spirit, Kimberley Lafferty sits down with Santiago Jiménez to explore a powerful, transformative experience of ego dissolution and spiritual awakening in the midst of everyday life. Santiago openly shares his journey through profound emptiness experiences that simultaneously revealed profound bliss and overwhelming challenges.
The conversation dives into the delicate dance between ultimate reality and the realities of daily living, highlighting the common spiritual trap of “falling off the cliff”—a state of blissful emptiness that denies the relative, human experience. Santiago vividly recounts his profound ego dissolution, describing it as a rebirth, feeling like a newborn child forced from the comfort of the womb into the overwhelming sensory chaos of human existence.
Kimberley and Santiago thoughtfully unpack the dangers of spiritual bypassing—using spiritual practices and realizations to avoid dealing with the complexities and difficulties of everyday life. They explore how the journey toward awakening involves not only profound spiritual insight but also an embodied embrace of our human vulnerabilities, relationships, and responsibilities.
Listeners are invited into a compassionate and nuanced conversation about navigating the “occupational hazards” of awakening—such as spiritual bypassing, ego dissolution, and reintegration into ordinary life—with insight, humor, and deep empathy.
If you’re experiencing your own spiritual challenges or curious about how to skillfully integrate profound spiritual awakenings into your daily life, this conversation is filled with wisdom and practical guidance.
Join Santiago in his upcoming event, “Zen and STAGES,” to further explore the powerful integration of Zen practice and developmental insights:
https://www.stagesinternational.com/zen-and-stages
Core Polarities
Key Questions
Here are some questions you can contemplate while listening to this discussion. We suggest you take some time to use these as journaling prompts.
- Have I experienced moments of profound emptiness or ego dissolution? How did these experiences reshape my understanding of who I am? Was there resistance, fear, bliss, or all of these?
- Do I tend to use spirituality or mindfulness practices to escape challenging emotions or difficult relationships? Where might I be bypassing or avoiding important aspects of my humanity?
- How fully do I recognize the emptiness of my own individual constructions? Am I able to see my thoughts, beliefs, and identity as fluid and impermanent, yet still meaningful?
- Do I experience reality as interconnected, not just conceptually but in a deeply embodied way? When and where do I most clearly feel this interconnectedness?
- Am I comfortable holding paradoxes without collapsing them into simpler truths? How do I respond emotionally and mentally when faced with seemingly contradictory realities?
- What is my relationship to emptiness and form? Do I tend to privilege one over the other, or can I rest in the dynamic tension between ultimate reality and everyday experience?
- How comfortable am I balancing ultimate truths with everyday realities? Do I tend to gravitate toward the absolute (emptiness, oneness) or the relative (daily responsibilities, relationships)? Where do I need greater integration?
- What structures or relationships support me through intense spiritual experiences? Do I have a community or mentor I can rely on? If not, how might I cultivate or seek these supports?
- Am I conscious of how my stage of development shapes my experience of spirituality? How might recognizing my current stage help me better understand my reactions, preferences, or blind spots on the spiritual path?
- Do I actively choose to engage with the complexity of being human? When faced with the chaos and vulnerability of life, do I resist, retreat, or embrace it as part of my conscious spiritual practice?
- How do I embody spiritual insights in my daily interactions and relationships? Do I bring compassion, presence, and authenticity to those around me, or am I unknowingly causing harm by staying detached or overly idealistic?
Previous Episodes of Evolving Spirit
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About Kimberley Lafferty
Kimberley Theresa Lafferty is a seasoned teacher-practitioner specializing in constructive developmental psychology and Indo-Tibetan Vajrayana. She leads multi-year, private spiritual education cohorts with the Confluence Experience. Kimberley co-leads, with Terri O’Fallon, the penultimate Minds I year-long developmental course of Stages International. She is an active Board member for the Association for Spiritual Integrity. Kimberley is also a wife and mother to a young son, living in a remote valley of the North Cascades of North America which deeply impacts her worldview and practice.

About Santiago Jiménez
Santiago is a multi-instrumentalist, composer and music producer. He is also a Zen Monk in the lineage of Zen Master Genpo Roshi, a certified coach in the Stages model, and a Big Mind Big Heart and Integral Relationships facilitator. As a musician he has toured around Europe, Asia and the Americas, playing with bands that range from classical, jazz and blues, to rock, latin and south American folk music. He has also participated as producer and musician in records that have been nominated for the Latin Grammy awards and had gotten the highest reviews by Rolling Stone magazine