Everything Is Workable gives readers the tools they need for dynamic, vital, and effective relationships, both personal and professional. Diane Musho Hamilton draws on her years of experience as a professional mediator, Zen practitioner, and student of Ken Wilber’s Integral Philosophy to present a spiritual approach to conflict resolution, providing teachings along with practices and exercises that can be applied to any sort of relationship in which conflict is a factor.
Few people would say they like conflict. Most of us try like heck to avoid it. If we take up meditation practice, we often expect that to make conflict go away. But . . . surprise! It never does. We still disagree with each other, argue, get hurt, say things we didn’t mean to say. It’s at the very least inconvenient. It’s often also destructive. We’re stuck with conflict as long as we’re human beings with jobs, relationships, or dry cleaning to be picked up.
Meditation practice enables us to touch the inner source of clarity, understanding, compassion, and peace–yet the equanimity that we cultivate on the cushion does not always translate into skillfulness in the way we handle conflict in our personal lives. Interpersonal conflict ends up being the most difficult and painful part of our path. Though meditation is incomparably helpful, it doesn’t make the sticky interpersonal issues go away. Conflict resolution skills are needed. Diane Musho Hamilton suggests that we make conflict resolution a valued part of our practice.
Diane Musho Hamilton is one of our most treasured friends and colleagues, and has played an invaluable role within the Integral community for nearly a decade. With sublime grace, skill, humor, and unflappable presence, Diane has helped thousands of us over the years to use integral perspectives to deepen our awareness and strengthen our practice. Diane has a new book coming out in just a couple weeks, Everything Is Workable: A Zen Approach to Conflict Resolution. We encourage you all to help support Diane’s book by pre-ordering a copy today!
Part 1: Inner Peace, Outer Peace
- Your ability to negotiate is determined by your ability to take perspectives
- The importance of being able to communicate a message to several different worldviews
- How meditative awareness helps with conflict resolution
- The difference between forming deep, positive intentions and childish wish fulfillment
- Practices to help you fully align yourself with your deepest intentions
Part 2: Attention, Awareness, and Perspective
- The difference between open and empty awareness and focused and volitional attention
- How being “fearless” means that you include fear, rather than avoiding fear or “being free of fear”
- Finding wisdom in the three ways we tend to deal with conflict: ignorance, passion, and aggression T
- he power of perspectives in disclosing different dimensions of truth
- The myth of “full enlightenment”
- The key to active listening without self-reference
Part 3: Can’t We All Just Get Along?
- How our aversion to conflict can be overcome by affirming both parties’ deepest wants and needs, which often helps them hold their own positions with less rigidity and attachment—once shared interests are identified, true creativity can begin
- How the Big Mind process can help alleviate conflicts in group settings
- How a simple reframing of our positions can help reduce negative language and increase mutual understanding and empathy
- Why arguing one worldview against another worldview is often an exercise in futility
- Managing conflict in intimate relationships
About Diane Hamilton
Diane is a uniquely gifted, playful, and awake group facilitator, consultant and teacher of Integral Spirituality and Zen. She is a lineage holder in the Soto Zen tradition, and has collaborated with the Integral Institute and Ken Wilber since 2004, developing the Integral Life Practice seminars and the Integral Spiritual Experience global events.
About Ken Wilber
Ken Wilber is a preeminent scholar of the Integral stage of human development. He is an internationally acknowledged leader, founder of Integral Institute, and co-founder of Integral Life. Ken is the originator of arguably the first truly comprehensive or integrative world philosophy, aptly named “Integral Theory”.