Escaping the Drama Triangle: Presence, Problem-Solving, and Relational Mastery

Dr. Keith WittCognitive, Emotional, Interpersonal, Intrapersonal, Love & Intimacy, Psychology, Video, Witt & Wisdom: Live with Dr. Keith

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Perspective Shift:

  1. Drama reveals unmet needs. Instead of viewing drama as unproductive or negative, we can see it as a signal of unmet emotional needs or relational disconnection. By responding to these needs with awareness and connection, drama can be transformed into a catalyst for growth and problem-solving.
  2. The drama triangle is a trap of misplaced agency. When caught in the roles of victim, rescuer, or persecutor, we give away our power and perpetuate cycles of dysfunction. Shifting perspective to reclaim agency allows us to exit these roles and engage more authentically.
  3. Projection distorts our perception of reality. Much of what we react to in others—whether in relationships or broader systems—is a reflection of unresolved aspects of ourselves. Becoming aware of these projections allows us to see others and the world more clearly.

Are you caught in cycles of relational drama and wondering how to break free?

Do you struggle to discern whether you’re solving problems in your relationships or perpetuating unproductive emotional dynamics?

How can integral insights help you navigate the complexity of modern relationships, therapy, and personal growth?

In this episode, Corey deVos and Dr. Keith Witt explore one of the most common yet misunderstood aspects of human interaction: the tension between drama and problem-solving. They dive deeply into the “Drama Triangle,” a psychological framework that reveals how the roles of victim, rescuer, and persecutor trap us in cycles of dysfunction. These dynamics, while often personal, are also embedded in cultural systems, politics, and even therapy itself.

Drawing from integral theory, Keith explains how drama is a signal of relational disconnection and unmet needs, while problem-solving is a path of self-awareness, connection, and growth. They discuss how therapy provides a transformative space by balancing unconditional acceptance with clear expectations for change, helping clients shift from reactive drama to creative problem-solving. Through rich examples—including Keith’s personal stories and reflections—they illuminate the emotional and relational signals that help us recognize when we’re stuck in drama and how to move beyond it.

Key themes include:

  • The power of self-awareness to shift from reactive drama to empowered problem-solving.
  • How relational disconnection is often the first problem to solve in any relationship.
  • The interplay of cultural narratives, such as green postmodernism, in amplifying cycles of victimhood and blame.
  • Why integrating emotional connection (relating) with practical resolution (problem-solving) creates transformative relationships.
  • The role of emotional signals, such as urgency or secrecy, in identifying drama dynamics.

Whether you’re navigating complex relationships, exploring personal growth, or grappling with cultural and systemic challenges, this episode offers practical insights and profound perspective shifts. Join Corey and Keith as they unpack the patterns that keep us stuck and the practices that help us grow.

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Dr. Keith Witt

About Keith Witt

Dr. Keith Witt is a Licensed Psychologist, teacher, and author who has lived and worked in Santa Barbara, CA. for over forty years. Dr. Witt is also the founder of The School of Love.

Corey deVos

About Corey deVos

Corey W. deVos is editor and producer of Integral Life. He has worked for Integral Institute/Integal Life since Spring of 2003, and has been a student of integral theory and practice since 1996. Corey is also a professional woodworker, and many of his artworks can be found in his VisionLogix art gallery.